“For Thou madest us for Thyself, and our heart is restless, until it rest in Thee” (1.1). So begins the acclaimed memoir from St. Augustine of Hippo, the 4th Century Christian bishop and thinker. In his famous thesis statement, captured at the end of the first paragraph of his writing, Augustine succinctly applies its truth to every stage of his maturation. What follows it is a masterwork in grappling with the understanding of the natures of both God and man, capturing insights in theology, psychology, and human nature.
As the most well-known of Augustine’s works, Confessions can and has been studied over and over. Although it fosters some intimidation common to any work written over 1600 years ago, I highly recommend taking the time to journey with Augustine through his formative years, exploring together the truths about God and humanity, sin and salvation, humility and wisdom. As a taste to whet your appetite, here are seven lessons that can be pulled from The Confessions of St. Augustine.
1. The freedom found in confessing sin
As the title implies, this is the key premise to the entire book. Augustine lays bare his persistent imperfections, doubts, temptations, sins, and struggles. His motive for writing is exposed at the beginning of the second chapter, where he writes, “I will now call to mind my past foulness, and the carnal corruptions of my soul; not because I love them, but that I may love thee, O my God” (2.1). Augustine’s courageous humility to confess his failures and spiritual doubts, without holding any protective regard for how it made him look, is a much-needed example for anyone facing the abyss of their own true depravity.
2. The influence of friends
Proverbs 13:20 instructs the reader to choose their friends carefully, saying, “Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm” (Proverbs 13:20, NIV). Much of Augustine’s life can be summed up by this verse. From stealing pears with young friends for nothing more than the shared thrill of thievery, to his friend Alypius being dragged against his will into watching a gladiatorial game, only to be sucked into the intoxication of bloodsport, the companionship of fools repeatedly induces harm to those around them.
In the same way, however, much of Augustine’s success and ultimate conversion can be attributed to God working through wise and faithful friends for his benefit. His friend Helpidius refutes the Manichaean heresies that had been confounding Augustine, and Nebridius shares with Augustine a desire “that with me he might live in a most ardent search after truth and wisdom” (6.17). Finally, his profession of faith comes only after seeing his friends Victorinius, Pontitianus, and Alypius take that same bold, public step. Whether or not he would agree with motivational author Jim Rohn that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, Augustine’s life certainly reverberates with the impacts of his close associates.
“Much of Augustine’s success and ultimate conversion can be attributed to God working through wise and faithful friends for his benefit.”
3. The allure of sin
Augustine repeatedly illustrates that sin is a persistent temptress, yet always a false advertiser, never able to deliver on her empty promise of satisfaction. His confession of sins includes exposing his chronic battle with the lust for sexual pleasures. He famously admits that his prayers as a young man included, “Give me chastity and continency, only not yet” (8.17), fearing that God would be too quick to hear and answer his prayer. He confesses that he wished to have the desire satisfied, not extinguished. This is, I fear, an all-too-common caveat when we seek God’s redemption in our struggles. Augustine understands how sinful pastimes, as foul-ending as they always are, have a seductive allure to them, whether for lust, deception, greed, pride, pleasure, or the praise of others.
Ultimately though, Augustine expresses the inevitable deep guilt that follows his surrender to temptations. He expresses this relatable grief, illustrating how it “sunk me in a gulf of shame” (2.2). Anyone who has battled with a repetitive sin can connect with that overwhelming metaphor. And, once initially freed from some of these sins, Augustine finds himself ricocheting into overly strict legalism.
Augustine clearly writes as one who understands the temptation of sin and the struggle to develop a healthy defense against it. Through it, he is enabled to viscerally connect with the forgiving mercy of his Heavenly Father.
4. The slow journey to embracing God’s truth
One of the most endearing qualities of Augustine is his humble willingness to live in the land of doubt. Despite being a man clearly in search of wisdom, knowledge, and truth, Augustine shares his honest struggle for slow answers. Throughout the book, he shares his pursuit of various belief systems and sources of wisdom, from the Manichaean religion to divination and astrology to the Platonic philosophies of the day. In the end, he finds fault with each path, observing how they don’t stand up to logical scrutiny or won’t embrace questioning—a sure red flag.
Along the way, Augustine continues to interrogate the scriptures and evaluate the Christian faith of his mother and his youth. He is not content to simply accept what has been handed to him. Augustine’s example shows that asking scary questions is not a sign of weakness or heresy. Living in the tension of doubt can cause us to look for an easy way out, but Augustine demonstrates that “I don’t know yet” is an acceptable, if not preferred, response to hard questions.
“Despite being a man clearly in search of wisdom, knowledge, and truth, Augustine shares his honest struggle for slow answers.”
5. The power of faithful prayers
A running theme that Augustine clings to like a lifeline is his mother Monica’s faithful prayers for his conversion. Throughout his retrospective tome, Augustine observes fondly his mother’s incessant and confident prayers for the conversion of his soul, despite his years of running to myriad other sources of pleasure and belief systems. Her prayer during his late teens sums up her heart for him, where he said, “My mother, Thy faithful one, weeping to Thee for me, more than mothers weep the bodily deaths of their children” (3.19). Any parent can relate to the often helplessly submissive prayer for the fate of their child, and they can equally celebrate with Monica in chapter 8 when he finally surrenders to the true faith in Christ made plain to him.
6. The bold power of the truth
Augustine’s search for truth that stands up to scrutiny takes him again and again to the pages of the Word. Through his investigation, he unearths significant theological truths around the nature of evil, the eternal nature of God, God’s persistent goodness and pursuit of sinners, the role of human will, and many other topics. The book would be worth its read if only for these considerations, and yet that is but the icing on the cake. In subjecting these truths to rigorous cross-examination instead of simply taking them at face value, Augustine shows that the truth of the Word of God can withstand any barrage of questions without trembling.
In the end, Augustine’s heart is converted through hearing the call of a childlike voice saying, “Take up and read; take up and read” (8.29). Upon hearing this, he took it as direction from God, and, flipping to the first passage he could find, read the words of the apostle Paul in Romans 13:13-14:
“Let us behave decently, as in the daytime, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and debauchery, not in dissension and jealousy. Rather, clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh.” (Romans 13:13-14, NIV)
“In the end, Augustine’s heart is converted through hearing the call of a childlike voice saying, ‘Take up and read; take up and read.'”
Hearing this, in response to his passionate repentance of his own sins in which he felt trapped, pierced his own soul in a way that logic alone could not fully reach. This then was the final step that brought him to a full profession of the faith in God. The bold power of the truth of God wins against all challengers and has the power to effect life change, and here again this truth is delivered in such a wonderfully personal way to Augustine.
7. The infinitely deep well of the wonder of God
A final gift to the reader is Augustine’s persistent marveling at the infiniteness, goodness, and character of God. Each chapter is littered with the confetti of Augustine’s joy and wonder over God’s nature. For example, Augustine observes the patience of God with sinners, tolerating their rebellion yet not abandoning them, as he notes in chapter 5: “Let the wicked, the godless, depart and flee from Thee; yet Thou seest them, and dividest the darkness” (5.2).
Augustine revels in the wonder and mystery of God as he reflects back on his life. In it all, he consistently notes the truth of the scriptures as applied to his life, and the tireless pursuit of God toward sinners, even as he struggles to fully understand it. We would do well to follow his example to adore the mysterious majesty of the Lord of all creation.