“Why can’t we all just get along?” We’ve all heard this phrase and have likely said it ourselves, usually in the thick of a heated argument to wave a white flag of surrender.
For Christians, thankfully, these words have an answer and an antidote. We know that we’re broken sinners in need of a Savior. And that the high watermark of our behavior can only be reached by the supernatural intervention of God’s Holy Spirit operating within us, urging us on toward Christlikeness. We know that, to some degree, this world will always be messy. After all, it still has people in it.
Christian kindness isn’t measured on a set of scales. In contrast, the secular world would say that kindness is a virtue that can be white-knuckled and forced, something to be extended and withdrawn at will, depending on the day. If someone hurts us, they’ve breached a social contract, and we believe the damages we pay back are justified. When we return fire with gossip, backstabbing, and strife, we make sure to remind ourselves that the target of our anger knew the consequences of crossing us. Kindness in the world’s eyes has limits.
“The secular world would say that kindness is a virtue that can be white-knuckled and forced, something to be extended and withdrawn at will, depending on the day.”
One of my state’s (Indiana’s) favorite sons is the author, Kurt Vonnegut. A lifelong atheist, he used the term “common decency” to describe a similar idea:
“I have had some experiences with love, or think I have, anyway, although the ones I have liked best could easily be described as ‘common decency.’ I treated somebody well for a little while, or even for a tremendously long time, and that person treated me well in return. Love need not have anything to do with it.”
Common decency, kindness, civility—there are many ways to state the same thing. We all want to go about our days inoffensively and unobtrusively. We want people to mind their own business and stay out of our way. And, in return, we’ll offer the same. Why? We think that’s the secret to making all of us happy.
C. S. Lewis shared an interesting observation about this in Mere Christianity:
“‘Niceness’—wholesome, integrated personality—is an excellent thing. We must try by every medical, educational, economic, and political means in our power, to produce a world where as many people as possible grow up ‘nice’; just as we must try to produce a world where all have plenty to eat. But we must not suppose that even if we succeeded in making everyone nice we should have saved their souls. A world of nice people, content in their own niceness, looking no further, turned away from God, would be just as desperately in need of salvation as a miserable world—and might even be more difficult to save.”
“We want people to mind their own business and stay out of our way. And, in return, we’ll offer the same.”
I think we can all agree we don’t live in a “nice” world. As Lewis pointed out, that’s actually a good thing. If we lived in Mayberry and could solve our problems over a slice of rhubarb pie, we’d be blind to our need for God.
Difficult relationships and interpersonal challenges remind us of the state of our world. They force us to confront our sin and others’ and push us to stay on mission. When Christians shut their eyes and say, “Why can’t we all just get along?” instead of asking God to help us reflect the kindness of Christ, the world around us suffers. And we miss out on a chance to be disciplined to love our neighbors well.
We’ve heard from Vonnegut and Lewis. Here’s what Jesus had to say in Luke 6:27-36 (NIV):
“But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Do to others as you would have them do to you.
“Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”
If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”
God was the first to be kind. What better source for sincere, sacrificial kindness could there be besides His church?
Would you ask the Holy Spirit to bring the fruit of that kindness to bear in your life today?
